What’s Stopping Me from Enjoying Playing Music Right Now?

This simple question sparked a rediscovery of my love for playing the piano.

It’s a refreshing alternative to the more common struggles musicians face:

Why can’t I bring myself to practice?

Why does my playing sound off?

How do others seem to play so effortlessly?

Why can’t I play with more confidence?

In my experience, judgment is the biggest barrier to playing with joy. Almost every note we play is first greeted by the inner critic: “Oh, you’re playing now? How nice. But while you’re trying to enjoy it, I’m just going to interrupt with a steady stream of commentary on everything that doesn’t match someone else’s idea of what’s ‘good’.”

That “someone else” is often the voice of a well-meaning teacher, parent, or examiner—someone who, with the best of intentions, has pointed out a “mistake” or given “constructive criticism.” The assumption is that by identifying flaws, we’ll be moulded into better musicians.

The problem is, these external voices can become internalised. They turn playing music—something that should be an act of personal expression—into a “problem to be solved.” Instead of joy, it becomes an ongoing performance to meet external expectations.

Yes, there’s a time and place for a critical approach, especially when we’re learning a piece someone else has composed. That’s part of the process, and it’s important. But here’s the thing: we’ve given this critical voice way too much weight in our musical lives.

We’ve edged-out the joy and spontaneity of simply playing. Or the peace and freedom of accepting ourselves as we are in this moment instead of constantly comparing ourselves to a better version that will someday arrive. But someday never comes.

But here’s the thing: a fortunate few (I’d guess less than 1%) manage to break through this cycle. These are the ones who either had inspiring mentors or, more often than not, stumbled upon a moment of pure musical joy—a glimpse of the freedom music can offer. It might’ve been the experience of playing something that truly inspired them, or connecting with other like-minded musicians who helped them rediscover what it feels like to play without judgment.

For many, though, this joy is buried under years of self-doubt, criticism, and pressure. So, what can you do if you’re not one of the lucky few?

You have two options: decide “I’ve had enough of this and I don’t want to take lessons/play music anymore,” or, you can choose a different path—a path to reconnect with the joy and wonder that music once promised.

This will be different for everyone but one simple question can help lift the fog and set us back on the path to joyous playing:  What’s stopping me right now from enjoying playing music?

Music is played and maybe this question can help us all towards a more playful, carefree relationship with music. Try it next time you’re at the piano or with your instrument. See what happens when you shift from focusing on what’s wrong to what’s fun.

In my next blog, I’ll dive into practical ways to apply this mindset, no matter your level of experience.